Two Seasons
by PrussianKnight9
Summary: If Hidan was asked about the seasons of the year, there were two in particular that provided lasting memories in his mind. Originally written on Tumblr for the prompt: "Summer vs Winter for Hidan & Kakuzu" by 'pommypoisonoverload'. Rated T for swearing.


**Hey guys!**** This oneshot is a little different from what I'd normally write, but it was a prompt I got on Tumblr that I've decided to post here so more people can see it. We are all thirsty for more Akatsuki-related content, and I hope this contributes a tiny bit. Enjoy!**

* * *

**Summer**

Hidan loved summer.

Why? Well.

It really wasn't as if the turning of the seasons meant less work, per se. Every morning he'd wake up to the ever-looming reminder of his tasks as a member of Akatsuki; not that he enjoyed them much, because hey–who enjoyed hunting down Tailed Beast all over the country anyway?

On top of that, bless his shitty luck, he was also partnered with the very individual that had quickly become the bane of his existence. Kakuzu, who saw to the job of maintaining the organization's financial shitholes, not only acted as if he'd lived his entire life with a fucking log shoved up his ass, but also deemed it necessary to ensure Hidan never had any ounce of fun whatsoever. This was especially true every time they went on those dumb chases after some shitty cash cow Kakuzu decided to drool over.

Usually the few bounties they'd go after would be caught all around similar areas in the summer, something about vacations or some shit. Well Hidan didn't get any of those, so fuck them. It would always be near some resort, or an isolated lake or beach that they'd find them at, and at times like these the Jashinist knew just how to be efficient. Just like today.

Hidan ripped off his cloak, trousers, and sandals, standing ass-naked on the mushy, yellow sand. With a mighty whoop, he charged head-on and took a mighty leap into the air, landing into the cool water with a huge _'splash'._ His mood soared high as the low temperature washed away the layers of sweat and soothed his muscles from the day's long, strenuous labor, and it didn't drop even as he turned to see Kakuzu, still fully swathed in clothes head to toe, glaring at him with definite anger.

"C'mon!" Hidan shouted, waving his hand emphatically over his head. "What are you doing? Get in already!"

"We don't have the time to be fooling around," Kakuzu snapped, unmoving from his spot.

Hidan rolled his eyes; the sand getting into his shoes must be uncomfortable, along with all the black he was wearing under this _sun_, and the bastard was going to pretend? Well, fine. But this time _he_ was going to take control.

With exaggerated effort, the Jashinist climbed back onto the shore, making sure he kept one hand tucked behind his back to hide his secret weapon. Kakuzu frowned at this, but kept his eyes stubbornly on Hidan's face.

"Look, Kakuzu, pal." Hidan placed his free, dripping hand on his partner's shoulder, soaking the cloak immediately. He ignored the older man's murderous look and went on with a fake sympathetic expression. "I know how hard you've been working all year, and there's no way you're not tired, man. Why don't you just relax for an hour or two? That bounty isn't going anywhere, and no, we're _not_ in a time crunch, I'm not stupid."

Kakuzu, while still stiff as a rod, was regarding him more evenly. "It doesn't matter if we have time to spare," he said. "I want to get the money and out of this weather as soon as possible."

It was difficult to refrain from smiling; the moment had come. Hidan pressed his lips together to keep that grin away. "You're hot, eh? Look, I know just the right way to solve that problem."

Jashin's pants, Kakuzu must have _really_ been hot; he must've gotten some sort of heatstroke too, because he actually raised his brow in question instead of flat-out refusing. Well, that just made Hidan's life easier. Without warning, he brought out his hidden hand, which was carefully cupping as much seawater as it could carry, and he whipped it _hard_ at the older man's face, cackling.

It actually made a resounding 'smack' as his little water-ball hit Kakuzu square in the face; for 2 seconds a look of absolute shock fell across Kakuzu's visage, before morphing into one of utter, unadulterated_ rage_.

Hidan knew that this was his cue to run now.

At the end of the day, Kakuzu had chased him straight into the sea, and Hidan couldn't escape a few bruises. But ultimately, he had succeeded in getting his partner in the water with him. The Jashinist laughed gleefully as he swam, splashing little waves at a drenched Kakuzu regarding him with a reproachful–yet funnily, a slightly less tense–expression on his face.

* * *

~*o*~

* * *

**Winter**

Hidan hated winter.

For starters, it was because of the lack of heathens frolicking about the streets as the gentle breezes turned to fierce, biting claws below freezing point, the roads slicked with ice and the sky grey and murky throughout the day, All in all, not the ideal weather for an outing.

It really messed with his system too, because his fingers would turn so cold that he'd begin to think that they were actually getting _hot, _and one time the Jashinist's entire pinky had _snapped right off_ when he accidentally hit his hands too hard over the counter desk. He'd been so numb that he'd failed to notice how his finger had frozen over to the consistency of ice, and in a lack of focus he'd let himself become a human popsicle. To say the inn receptionist was horrified was an understatement.

While he was shuddering violently from the icy chill however, one particular bastard remained looking all fine and fucking dandy. 'Your fault for not bundling up', he'd call from his bed whilst Hidan screamed in the bathroom as he soaked his frostbitten hands in the sink. The flaw in that little logic was that the Jashinist didn't have anything to wear other than what he had already, and buttoning up his cloak all the way did nothing to prevent the wind from penetrating through his flesh. All the pain he'd feel from defrosting body parts was only a reminder of how miserable he was, and so he didn't derive any enjoyment from that, either. He really, really hated winter.

So one day, as he resumed in partaking in his daily ritual of _teeth chattering_ and _intense, uncontrollable shaking _as they fought their way down this Jashin-forsaken forest trail, his toe caught on something hard and unmoving in the foot of snow and he toppled forward with a yelp, creating a nice, Hidan-shaped hole in the white expanse of soft, poofy ice. Groaning miserably, he sat up and took in his soaked cloak with disgust. Now he really was going to freeze in this fucking arctic wasteland.

To make matters worse, the wind started picking up and howling, whipping at their cloaks and stinging their cheeks painfully. It was almost impossible to see more than 2 feet ahead.

What _was_ possible to see however, was the way Kakuzu was staring down at his crumpled form. Hidan swore the bastard was laughing behind that mask. Sick, heartless old geezer, he grumbled to himself, ignoring the sudden heat of shame rising in his face. He must look absolutely ridiculous.

They battled their way towards the densest parts of the forest which provided them some shelter from the merciless wind. Hidan was about to crawl into a nook between two white trunks when suddenly he felt two large hands closing around his shoulders and pulling him back before he could regain his balance. When he recovered from the surprise, the Jashinist abruptly realized that his face was now currently half-smushed into a thick layer of fleece and wool.

What the fuck? What had happened? What was this thing?

"Stop squirming or I'll dump you back out there," came a familiar, irritated voice, but suddenly it sounded much, _much _closer, and it definitely had come rumbling out from behind the very layers of fabric he was being smothered into. "I can't have you complaining about hypothermia by the time we get our new mission, when I actually need your cooperation."

_Holy fuck–_

"The fuck!?" Hidan squawked loudly, echoing his own thoughts, trying to sit up so he could assess his situation better. But that's when he finally noticed the two arms that practically enclosed around the entirety of the Jashinist's upper body with undeniable strength, and _Jashin's pants_, he couldn't believe this was actually happening. He stilled his struggles, turning his head so he could breath and as a result pressing his ear right against Kakuzu's chest where despite the thick clothes, he could still hear the pronounced thundering of his five hearts.

"Uh," said Hidan, after two whole minutes of awkward silence while the blizzard howled around them. "This is really uncomfortable, y'know. My entire body is being twisted like a fucking candy stick and I can't feel my hands."

Kakuzu snorted, but did nothing to alleviate said discomfort. The Jashinist growled, and shoved his palms under the many layers of those damned jumpers without warning. His partner flinched at the sudden contact of freezing flesh against his own, warmer stomach. "Hidan," he muttered threateningly.

"Fine, fine." He removed his hands, not wanting to be pushed away because _Jashin damn it_ this bastard was warm. What a greedy miser he was, hogging all the winter gear to himself. Whatever, they were all scratchy and gross anyway.

Hidan sighed into the wool. The older man smelled faintly of cheap soap and, unsurprisingly, the metallic tang of coins. But for once he didn't think he minded that much, at all.

* * *

**This was the first time I ever tried to write a Hidan &amp; Kakuzu fic that contains actual kindness one would witness from normal human beings, without any of the mixed "oh god I can't stand you why am I doing this" conflict going on in their heads. I just can't see their minds working like this, but it was still fun to write! **

**Like? Love? Hate? Please tell me what you think; your reviews will be greatly appreciated! :)**


End file.
